What a wicked wednesday it was.
It seemed like the Gods where us from the get go.
Our supposed 'golden hours', black country hillside frolic, tormented not just by tree collapsing gail force winds but a snow storm performing in diagonals.
We managed to secure a makeshift den under the umbrella like branches of the evergreen beast. Unfortunately our chosen foliage was planted on a 65degree slope. So, hello face planting and goodbye pretty lens, as it tumbles down into a hundred foot ibis.
After 2hours of scanty cladding around old tree trunk corpses and the likes, our 9.30am weather conditions wernt proving any more promising, in fact they where getting slightly frost bitten-ly out of hand.
So 'hi-ho-hi-ho' off to tip-top studios we go. Only to be greeted by a few unwanted eager beavers, anticipating use of the not-so sharable studio.
Wading through the wild winds of the jewellery quarter, via a jacket-potatoe snack bar thats "currently not serving jacket potatoes". Unto a pleasantly surprising partner studio, that oozed more beautifully diffused light than you could shake a stick at.
...And Im sure that the seventy something gemologist, in the window adjacent was more than apperceive to find a very naked me through his spy glass, on a other wise subfus Wednesday morning.
After a quick fire of dynamic silhouettes, symmetrical stances and 'pondering at the window' kinda portraiture, we where onto the final slice of the days unknown.
An artsy creative hub, boasting crafts, designers and sweet smelling pumpkin soup lunches.
The place is advertsised as a studio, although there is a
'slight catch'... in that the owner doesn't actually own the premises. Therefore were not actually permitted to shoot there.
Oh and ps....."Some young children might pass through".
We managed to find a secluded decaying room, that was very photo friendly and also boasted that all important privacy. But within 10minutes of shooting Raphy needed pee-pee. And when Raphy needs pee pee, Raphy really needs pee-pee.
This when the real fun and games began.
To our surprise, we had been locked inside this very cold, very dusty room and remained so for the next 12 years.
Well maybe not 12 years, but boy does time go slowly when you gotta go.
We screamed and we stamped, we text and we rang, with no such luck. Then came out the crow bars and the kung fu kicks at the door.
OK, so im not gonna steel Paul's thunder. The only handling of heavy material I was partial too was cradling my globe like bladder.
But of course theres a happy end to this story, and as im sure you've guessed, I didn't die of starvation in a pool of my own urine, nude.
...Although Im sure theres a niche in the market for that kinda stuff.
To cut a long story short...
Super Bartholomew broke down the hatchway, I found the ladies, and we drove into the
sunset I mean...gridlocked Wolverhampton, eating lindor treats, and we all lived happily ever after.
Here's two of my favourite pretties from the day...
Now for a full sugar hot vimto and a much needed, Jo Malone - Nectarine blossom and Honey, soak in the tub... complete with far too many fire hazard vanilla tea lights.
Chow for now,
with love Raphaella McNamara x